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Gaffer Tape's YouTube Reviews of Awesome Candy-Creating Goodness! (The Facts of Life/Star Trek III Conspiracy!) — Page 13

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Hey there, Frink.  Hey, hey, hey.  It's okay.  Dust bunnies are important too.  I mean... without them, um, dust wouldn't be as cute?  No, no, wait.  That's not right.  Your computer is awesome because it sucks up dust bunnies that everyone hates because people hate... cuteness?  No, wait.  Cuteness is evil because it distracts us from what's really important:  waffles.  I could really go for some waffles right now.  Mmmmmm.  Wait.  What were we talking about again?  Oh, yeah!  Good job on those waffles, Frink!

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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my friend: "Do you remember the name of that famous hunchback?"

me: "Does Quasimodo ring a bell?"

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AAAAAAAAAH!  My beautiful thread has been hijacked with pictures of nearly-human cookies!!!

I like it.

I knew Frink would bring some liveliness back here.  Thank you.

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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So now that Frink has brought the refreshments, I just want to announce that my video made the cut for Who Reviews the Reviewers, and I'll now be put through (hopefully) several wacky tasks.

Contest Results

So if anyone sees the videos that follow and thinks I've gone crazy... well, yes, I have, but it's been that way for a long time.  Anyway, my first task is to review a common household object.  So... yeah.

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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Squeaky chair!

IT'S MY TRILOGY, AND I WANT IT NOW!

"[George Lucas] rebooted the franchise in 1997 without telling anyone." -skyjedi2005

"Yeah, well, George says a lot of things..." a young 1997 xhonzi on RASSM

"They're my movies." -George Lucas. 19 people won oscars for their work on Star Wars (1977) and George Lucas wasn't one of them.

Rewrite the Prequels!

 

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Yes, xhonzi has the win.  I, however, don't have the squeaky chair.

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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So I have completed my first challenge:

News Marches Forward - Utensil of Legend

Thanks to doubleofive for another awesome logo.  Please enjoy!

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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Gaffer Tape said:

"... the fowl of the air, the fish of the sea..."

^no sarcasm intended, I lol'd at the clips from the movie. :-LOL

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Leonardo said:

Gaffer Tape said:

"... the fowl of the air, the fish of the sea..."

^no sarcasm intended, I lol'd at the clips from the movie. :-LOL

Wow.  A Citizen Kane animated gif, at least in my eyes, certainly raises the artform of animated giffery to more respectable levels, I think.  Bravo.  And thank you.

And, yeah, the entire structure was modeled after Citizen Kane's "News on the March," so there are subtle (and not so subtle nods to it throughout).  But there's actually one more direct Citizen Kane-ism nestled in it...

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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Superman The Movie The Ending Review!

My next challenge for Who Reviews the Reviewers.  Oh, yeah, I guess I should have mentioned that I wasn't voted off last week.  This week's challenge was to review something I didn't like.  So I did.

Oh, and at Frink's great advice, I reduced the run time from three hours to seven minutes.  I hope I didn't leave out anything important.

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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Gaffer Tape said:

Oh, and at Frink's great advice, I reduced the run time from three hours to seven minutes.  I hope I didn't leave out anything important.

I expect a royalty check.

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I'd love to see you do a positive review of something you hate. Like go through the Shumaker Batmans and only talk about the good things. If there are any.

Star Wars Revisited Wordpress

Star Wars Visual Comparisons WordPress

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Wow.  We must be on the same wavelength!  For months I've thought about doing an all-positive review of Batman & (note the ampersand) Robin, just for the fun of it.  As screwy as that movie is, I actually think there are plenty of decent concepts in it.

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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It came to me this morning as I was sitting on my kitchen floor watching your review on my iPhone. I'm imagining you showing a clip of something so bad that you want to say something negative and then showing you fuming not saying anything, then being like "lets move on!"

It would be epic.

Star Wars Revisited Wordpress

Star Wars Visual Comparisons WordPress