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Episode III: Revenge of the Ridiculousness

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Thank the Maker! Shall we go chronologically or throw ideas out at random?

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Where were you in '77?

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Okay! Something off the Top Gun soundtrack for the opening battle sequence.

Those annoying Buzz droids have Hal 9000 eyes, so why not have them speak like Hal?

R-20,000 needs a good death line. "Avenge me!"?

The Super Battle Droids that hassle Artoo could either speak like the rednecks in Deliverance or be subtitled. At least they need to be different from the regular battle droids in their speech in some way.

I remembered some truly awful muzak that could be good for the endless elevator scenes, or background music piped throughout Grievious' ship.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Url3QHHNKSA

I still have my Duke Nukem CD somewhere with this track on it.

Duke Dooku's severed head won't shut up and die, singing to itself in the background. When the ship changes attitude, his head rolls into the elevator shaft and falls past our heroes, still singing.

Replacing General Grevious' voice would be hilarious, but I'm stumped on who he could sound like.

Airplane! music and dialog as Anakin crash lands the ship. Lloyd Bridge's "He's coming right at us!" as the control tower is demolished.

The pod race announcers return as the host(s) of "Coruscant Tonight" relating handsome boy toy Anakin's daring rescue of Palpatine. They then casually mention in a related story how many people died when the ship crash landed...

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Where were you in '77?

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SilverWook said:

Duke Dooku's severed head won't shut up and die, singing to itself in the background. When the ship changes attitude, his head rolls into the elevator shaft and falls past our heroes, still singing.

I love that idea.

Here are a couple of more that might be funny:

  • Palpatine: I want you to be the eyes, ears, hands, feet, legs, toes, etc., and voice of the Republic. 
  • Frustrate Palpatine by an endless amount of dialogue by Anakin when Palpatine explains about Darth Plagueis: The movie life as a house has: I don't know what that means. and I still don't know what it means. Palpatine could at one point just give up and walk away. and I'm not even listening.
  • Yoda: Good relations with the Wookies, I have. (A quick cut to the Star Wars Christmas Special of the Wookie wife and kid)
  • Kenobi: Did I miss something? (every time he walks into frame)
  • Vader's speech sounds like a speek & spell with Palpatine or a droid saying that this will be fixed later
  • Padme: Hold me, like you did by the lake on Naboo; so long ago when there was nothing but our love. No politics, no plotting, no war. (leave it. this is comedy-gold!)
  • After delivering Luke and Leia, Padme goes on and on about that there is still good in Annie (everyone gets bored and they turn off the lights with her still going on)

 

Maybe some of this is helpful. :)

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I think people seem to be overestimating TV's' skills. ;-)

I like leaving Padme's "hold me" straight, but maybe have a shot of Anakin just staring at her for several seconds, then cut to the next scene.

Don't make me watch Ep3 again, please!

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You could use lines from "Backstroke of the West". Like... "They want to know him at f*ck"

"Yeah and... and... and I'm gonna be back to talk about them Rolexes."

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 (Edited)

Is there enough Vader dialog in the OT to make him say "Do not want"?

FOUND IT:

"Asteroids DO NOT concern me, Admiral. I WANT that ship, not excuses."

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"Obi-Wan once felt as you DO"

"I WANT that ship, NOT excuses"

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He could use most of that "want that ship" line. He's not very excited, but that may make it funnier.

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The pitch could be slightly altered to make more insistent but as you say it might sound funnier as is.

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I'd love to hear Padme's "Hold me" lines given to Palpatine as while he reveals himself to Anakin. :)

Preferred Saga:
1/2: Hal9000
3: L8wrtr
4/5: Adywan
6-9: Hal9000

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Bingowings said:

I thought I'd remind you of ideas here...

Hey, thanks Bingo! I knew I suggested something.

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 (Edited)

Just doing my job sir.

There's plenty of room for Airplane! and Airplane 2 gags during the crash of The Invisible Hand (Stephen Stucker seems essential).

KOTCS monkeys on Kashyyyk might be fun too.

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Bingowings said:


Just doing my job sir.

There's plenty of room for Airplane! and Airplane 2 gags during the crash of The Invisible Hand (Stephen Stucker seems essential).
I just wanted to tell you good luck, we're all counting on you.

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Airplane! love theme when Padme and Anakin reunite.

When Yoda walks into Palpatine's senate chamber office, the red Royal Guards could speak in the Black Knight's voice. "None shall pass!" just before Yoda knocks them silly. As they lie on the floor "All right, we'll call it a draw."

One thing that's long bugged me is how the guards are noticeably absent when Mace confronts Palpatine. Is there way to have them there but not give a damn about what's happening? Maybe they are snoring loudly? There is a shot of them leaving the room in Jedi, but I don't know if that would work  here.

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Where were you in '77?

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You could use the ending of Airplane 2 with Shatner talking them down long after they've crash landed.

Heck, start with Airplane 2 as the source, and put in Star Wars when you have to.

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Ye gods, Bingowings! Get out of my head! ;)

I thought Jefferson Starship from the HS would work there too...

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 (Edited)

If I got out of your head I'd end up in your dreams and via Billy Ocean your car and who knows where that would take us?

I still would love to see OS Cylons in the opening battle and Viper pilots too while we are at it.

The whole robots vs humans thing lends itself to a Galactica/PT mash up.

The Galactica music in Airplane 2 kind of adds to the logic of the thing.

While you are at it why not throw in The Black Hole, Buck Rogers and Battle Beyond The Stars for added irony (what with them being considered Star Wars rip-offs at the time).

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 (Edited)

When Anakin is "landing" the ship, have Lesley Nielsen from Airplane repeatedly coming in saying "I just want to tell you both good luck. We're all counting on you." :p

Not sure if even possible as I can't even recall the camera angles or how much footage there is to work with.

Edit: Dammit. Doubleofive seems to have said this already. 

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If only Grievous could be replaced with Maximillian!

Mixing in classic BSG sounds like a great idea too.

The medical scene with Padme could have classic Trek sickbay sound effects. (I have the Trek sound effects CD with this.) One of the medical monitors could read "Life insurance remaining" or "Will to live remaining." Also "Heart Status:Broken"?  Revoice the medical droids with Dr. McCoy and Nurse Chapel?

Since Padme is probably really medicated, she could give really goofy names to the twins?

I had the really out there idea of Grievous' personal fighter being the Winnebago from Spaceballs. (Or replace Bail Organa's Tantive with it?) That way Obi Wan can fly it to Tatooine at the end of the movie and crash it. "Not good!"

Yoda communing with Qui Gon could be "restored" with nonsensical Liam Nesson dialog?

Yoda's departure from Kashyyk could be rescored with music from E.T.

Yoda's arrival on Dagobah could be used with a long bleeped out curse when he surveys the slimy mudhole he's stuck on for the next twenty years.

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SilverWook said:


Yoda communing with Qui Gon could be "restored" with nonsensical Liam Nesson dialog?
The particular set of skills speech from Taken!

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